When I am rushed into things, I find myself flailing around and not able to be effective. This is mostly a morning thing, but thinking about this makes me realize it may be a overall “Jill” thing.
I know everyone is rushed. Overwhelmed. It is the way of our life these days. I find myself trying to find ways to do better at what I do. Focus less on what I don’t do. Looking for the joy in things that make up my days anyway. Trying to give myself time to think ahead.
When I Am Rushed In the Morning
Today I was all set to get a running start on the day because I had to be ready early for the cleaning people so I could go out later to get my hair cut. But instead of getting a running start on my day, I feel rushed. I am getting things done, but I’m not sure I’m really here yet.
I routinely tell people I am not a morning person, and I endeavor not to set appointments and other things that require me to interact with others until after 9:30 am. It just goes better all around! But I can always hear the slight nervousness in their laughing response to that statement. It took me a long time to admit that it is really hard for me to deal with other people in the morning. Admitting it was good for me, but as stated, that is not something that others seem able to appreciate. When I give in, I just feel rushed.
Mitch, for the most part, knows this is true, but he wakes up awake. He is ready to talk, so it is only by continual reminder–and admittedly some unkind words, missed responses, and my forgetting things, that he has learned to just wait until I’m functioning at a higher level. Despite feeling rushed, I am full of thoughts and ideas in the morning. I prefer to internalize them, not discuss them. That’s why I have a pad of paper sitting on the counter in the bathroom. It is also available when I am awake during the night.
I function best when I am not rushed and allowed to ease into the day. I’m sure this is, at least in part, because I am a life-long insomniac. Although I frequently sleep quite well, there are nights I don’t, and then I am catching up for days afterwards. Plus, I go pretty full-tilt all day, so I’m worn out, and if I don’t sleep well, it starts to pile up. Quickly.
When I Am Rushed On Projects
I seem to take forever on some projects. I always attribute it to my not working hard enough, but perhaps I need to rethink that point of view. Perhaps it is my need for reflection and thought that makes things take so long. I want to get things done, because I have a lot of things I want to do. I always feel rushed.
When I Am Rushed Generally
I fail to plan and I get overwhelmed by all the details of getting things done. I fail to allow adequate time to digest and internalize, and find myself rushed to get stuff done, on a usually unrealistic timeline. The worst part of being rushed is not having time to reflect on what I do and enjoy the process of doing it.
Bonnie Baker says
Jill, you totally described Bill’s and mine morning issues. I am not a morning person. Never have been. Bill, like Mitch, even before I have my coffee, wants to discuss all sorts of things. I just need to be quiet and slowly wake up. 9:30 I can handle but it’/s usually about 10am I’m ready for my day.
Phyllis Bradley says
I could wax all metaphysical, Jill, about easing not so much into the day as easing back into the body. I’ll spare you. Just saying thank you. Some of us share your condition, and relate all too well.
Jacquie Wareham says
I’m a lot like that in the morning too. I try not to schedule any meetings before 10. I also feel the pressure to be “on” at 9:00 (or earlier). I will tell people I’m not available earlier, and let them assume I have an earlier appointment, and I do- with myself! For me this is one of the huge benefits of being self-employed, creating a schedule that works for my own rhythms.
Jill,, I appreciate your courage to be vulnerable and talk about this Talking about it helps shift people’s perceptions of what is right or normal, that if you aren’t at your desk at a certain time that you are not productive, contributing, you are lazy or weak. Not true! What we are is being true to ourselves and courageously honouring our own way in the world. <3